I have good news
First, I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to GEICO.
Second, I believe I’ve found the problem that makes the updater crash. If I’m right, it was a pretty simple should’ve-retained-that bug in Sparkle. If the fix works, we’ll have a 1.1.1 out sometime soon—if all goes well, within the hour.
Sorry about all this, people. But those of you who came to the IRC channel to help us find the problem, thank you very much.